Sunday, April 11, 2010

Jersey Blues

My first blog! And of corse my topic is Jersey. I've been reading my cousins facebook posts about getting ready to move back to NJ and I am ready to get on the next flight and be there too! My heart sinks thinking about all we are missing out on (when I say we I mean me, everything would be new to baby and Sam doesn't miss it at all). The Jersey summer is fast approaching and I am ready for walks on the boards, slices of pizza big enough for two, nights on the deck, over crowded beaches filled with NJ and NY accents, big hair and shiny purses. Most of all, I am ready for FAMILY! Baby Samuel can not spend his days looking at me and Sam thinking this is it. This is not it, there is soooo much I need to share with him. I know NOTHING about SC life and have nothing here to share with him. People offer suggestions but regardless of good directions and opinions I have no roots here and to be honest I have no good reason to be here... OK, I had no good reason to COME here but now we own a house and Sam has a good job, plus we have found a home church. I really feel that all these are replaceable but with consequences. Sam could find a state job in NJ but then we deal with the politics, and we could find a suitable church but the desire for Christ is not the same in NJ (Sam has made roots in our church here but I'll lift right out!) So housing... here is a major problem. We just can't afford to live there. Now what? Maybe Deleware? Excuse me while I re-read what I can't beleive I just thought. Ughhhh, I can't even debate this with myself anymore. That is what this blog is anyway, a debate with myself. But I know my mother and maybe some other family will read so please send me money for air fare! I MUST get home!

P.S. Don't comment on my spelling and/or grammer. I don't want to proof read becuase I may change some things and mask my feelings to spare others and Jersey girls don't do that.

3 comments:

  1. Liz I so understand how you feel, I moved away 10 years ago and I really get sad thinking of all the family time My family and I have missed. My kids really missed a lot growing up.You tend to think you can just pick up and go home and after you do it that's when you realize traveling is not as Cheap as we would like to think. I just want you to know you are not alone feeling this way.. I can't wait to meet baby Sam.

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  2. Lizz, I understand too. We moved 15 years ago, can you believe it. It's been hard but mine and Ron's relationship I feel is stronger because we only had ourselves to rely on. We love getting home to see everyone but this is where our journey has taken us.

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  3. I understand what you're saying but I really think it is in your power to make it what you want it to be. Chris and I love Colorado and Denver... it is our home and when we go to our old 'homes' (NJ & SD respectively) we realize that we miss Colorado and the lives we've built here. I think it took a good 5 years to feel that way though. And, now it has been 12 years and I can't imagine being anywhere else.

    When I'm homesick for NJ I take a moment to think about where my life might be had I stayed there and I truly believe that moving away was the best thing I ever did. It was a chance to see new perspectives and find out who I really was apart from those things that I just assumed were true because it was all I had ever known. Some advice I can give to you is to give it time - it take a few years to really develop strong roots and relationships.

    On the flip side of all of that... there is the fact that nothing is forever. Should you come to the conclusion that moving back to NJ is really the right thing for you then it is 100% possible. Things like housing, church etc. will work themselves out. There are some days when I wake up and all I really want is to have lunch with my mom and I question why I live on the other side of the country. I do sympathize.

    Deep down I really do know that I'm so lucky to have taken the chance that I did in my life when I moved away. I miss my family - but absence makes the heart grow fonder. The time I do get to spend is always special - and part of that is because it is not an everyday thing...

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